Nobody is the chair.

The chair is the chair.

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II

The chair

Loading object 001
Object 001 · Material: leather, oxblood · Provenance: unknown · Occupants to date: 6 known
Drag to rotate
III

The seated

Six hosts. One chair. Every entry below is a public office holder or the chief executive of a financial institution. Every line describes the chair, not the person.

00
Jerome Powell, black and white portrait
Federal Reserve · Wikimedia Commons · public domain · 16 August 2022
photo used for satirical commentary. no affiliation.
Occupant 00
Jerome Powell
Chair of the Federal Reserve, 2018 – 2026. Named chair pro tempore, 15 May 2026.
The chair released him in May. It did not move.
Federal Reserve Board press release, 15 May 2026
IV

The next sitting

0
0
Days
0
0
Hours
0
0
Minutes
0
0
Seconds
Federal Open Market Committee

The chair will be occupied for approximately ninety minutes, and the price of everything you own will be decided by whoever is resting in it.

The chair is not yet available. It has never been in a hurry.

V

The waiting list

0
Claimants waiting
The ledger is empty. It opens when the contract is deployed.
When it opens, joining will request a wallet message signature — a cryptographic signature, not a transaction. Zero cost, zero gas. The signature is verified server-side before the entry is written, so the ledger cannot be filled with addresses nobody holds.
Claimant pass · 1200 × 1200 · specimen
VI

Musical chairs

Ten rounds.
The waltz stops. You have one and a half seconds to name who sat down.
Round
0 / 10
Status
Seated
The record
ContractNot yet deployed
X@thechairfund
Object001 · Leather, oxblood · Provenance unknown
Issued11 August 2026
This site is a work of satire and parody. It is not affiliated with, endorsed by, or connected to any person, company, or institution depicted or named. All photographs are public images used for commentary, credited to their source. $CHAIR is a memecoin with no intrinsic value and no expectation of financial return.
Image removal requests
removals@thechairfund.xyz

If you appear in a photograph on this page and want it removed, write to the address above. It comes down the same day, without argument and without asking why.

Prototype — not for publication

Still outstanding before this page can go live:

  • The token is not deployed. The waiting list stands at zero.
  • Section V: the waiting list is not open. It needs a database and server-side signature verification before it accepts a single claimant.
  • The opening is a still. The eight-second hero video has not been generated yet.